I’m home on spring break and it’s going alright. Was a lot of fun yesterday spending time with Kyle and some of his friends, I’ve lately been feeling really free from worry and concern. Not sure if that’s a good thing or not but it sure is relaxing and a relief. Just been really laid back in the past day since I got home.
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Earlier today my Mom made a comment about how I had become snappier with my comments in being overly technical of others. That has really been working a number upon my mind for the rest of today and I think I’ve found the cause. It lies in the environment I am in over at school, allow me to explain.
I believe that anyone can become anything and do whatever they choose to do, not just from a legal sense but also from an ability sense. I understand that most people don’t believe me and will offer up some half-assed mental excuse for why they aren’t and won’t ever put forth the effort to chase something, no matter how unrealistic it may seem.
It might have started as a defensive technique to help me cope with the change in environment and, more so, attitude. I know that Stout isn’t a very challenging school (I find my share of challenges outside of the classroom, just as I did in high school) but the fact that so many people hold the mindset that they can’t simply because of who they are astounds me. That people there openly tell me something as ignorant as, “You should be doing something better then art” or imply “I couldn’t do ______ because I _______.”
I’m just growing so tired of people who can’t see past imperfections to be witness to everything that is there, right in front of them. How beautiful the smile on her face when you can look past imperfections, that doesn’t mean that you ignore imperfections (as we all have them so why dwell upon them), just that you can see past them to something better. Without being able to see where you are heading or wish to go you will stand stagnant and immovable. There is no amount of inspiration or training that can help you get somewhere without the vision, the vision for who you, and the people around you, are or have the potential to be.
Maybe it’s a gift that I can see this in people, but the fact that I haven’t met anyone who really shares that belief with me is dragging on me. I’m not sure if I did back in high school, though I know my parents do both believe in that theory and I do with all my heart.
I just long for someone in that community and environment who’s able to see things the way I do.
Take care and God bless,
~paul